beyond the sun
across the sea
I thought the world
belonged to me
and headed off undaunted
I ate too fast
I drank too much
stayed out too late
could never get enough
no passing feast
could ever fill me up
what it was I wanted was
sustenance
amphetamines
never picked me up
nor did bitter coffee
from a Dixie cup
ever enhance my living
I wasn’t saved
through innocence
nor through reason
nor through deliverance
I tried them all
and cast them out at once
promising but never giving
sustenance
so tell me why somehow the moon is never bright enough
and no one’s heavy load is ever light enough
the truth was never
true enough
and you were never
you enough
god knows what I wanted
I did the best
that I could do
it’s not for lack
of loving you
so many others
so much worse off than us
all that there was missing was
sustenance
I learned to breathe
I learned to crawl
I wanted more
I wanted to have it all
I never realized
As everybody must
That all that I was looking for was sustenance